SWEARRR TO HIMMMMMM!!! WHILE GROWLLLING!!!

Well, Hollywood's idea is just to run shit into the ground until people realize it's gone bad and then redo it to make more money. Batman Begins really capitalized on this during the comic book craze of the new millenium. So let's dive in and find out if American Psycho does a better job at being the caped crusader than George Clooney.

Story begins with young Bruce Wayne falling down a well, his father rescuing him from the big bad scary bats, the family goes to the opera and well, that's when Bruce turns into an aristocratic orphan. Years later the killer is on parole and Wayne wants to kill him, but mobsters beat him to it and after having a sitdown with the mob boss, Bruce disappears off the face of the world to be a criminal to learn how they think or something and is hauled off to a prison in China where he's eventually freed by the awesome Qui-Gon Jinn, I mean Schindler, Zeus... Turns out the Jedi master is part of an assassin's guild cult called the League of Shadows and their training Bruce Wayne to a merciless killing machine for justice. But Bruce realizes justice isn't a one sided story and he burns down the castle and returns to Gotham to lead his company outta his like, 20 year hiatus... But his company isn't having this obvious corporate genius take charge so the send him to work in some R&D department located... Somewhere not that known I guess.

"Welcome to the corporate deadend, Mr. Wayne. Feel free to use any of your company's stuff which is technically YOUR stuff for whatever."
-Lucious Fox
"I want this, this, and this for legitimate aristocratic playboy stuff."
-Bruce Wayne
"I'm not an idiot, I'm Morgan Freeman, I know you wanna be a caped vigilante. Now let me show you the battletank."
-Lucious Fox

"No, Bruce! That's the passenger eject button! Are you trying to kill me?! I knew I should've sold this thing to 007..."
-Lucious Fox

Not kidding, that's prett much how those scenes go. So then we see a criminal psychiatrist is scaring people and is lacing drugs with his personal fear toxinand Batman gets his ass powned and set on fire... Great job, Bale, you'll get him in the 2nd round when he scares your girlfriend that thinks you're just a rich asshole now. Plot twist with Qui-Zeus Schindler being the leader of the League of Shadows and plotting to competely destroy Gotham with Scarecrow's fear toxin. Though what still throws me off is somehow Liam Neeson's character hated Bruce Wayne's father for helping the poor, because he tried to ruin Gotham's economics or something, and the banter makes it out like he was actually responsible for the death of Thomas Wayne...

"MASTER QUI-GON?! Somehow YOOOOOUUUUU killed dad?! NOOOOOOOOOO!"
-Batman

So needless to say, the film climax ends with Batman fighting the League of Shadows and stopping the plot to completely destroy Gotham and render it's citizens psychotics that are constantly in fear. That outta the way, the special effects are pretty good, acting's pretty good aside from Christian Bale trying to act like he's a death metal singer everytime he dones the batsuit. Story and setup could be better but it's really not bad, actually a pretty entertaining Batman movie. Could use some more detectiving and sleuthing though, this time it's mostly Lucious Fox who knows everything and solves the criminal mysteries and patterns. Bale just figures stuff out when it's looking him dead in the eye.

And so I give Batman Begins 4 out of 5 anti-psychotic meds. I picked on it, but it's really good how everything is brought together. Could be better, but also could be a LOT worse.